


He Died Painlessly And With Honour

by dianemaryallison



Category: Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. (TV)
Genre: Gardening isn't Melinda's strength, The Philinda Bad Days Project
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-08-13
Updated: 2015-08-13
Packaged: 2018-04-14 14:50:20
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 967
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4568586
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/dianemaryallison/pseuds/dianemaryallison
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Melinda killed Phil's plant.</p>
            </blockquote>





	He Died Painlessly And With Honour

**Author's Note:**

> Written for the day 13 od Philinda Bad Day Challenge. Hope you enjoy.

“ Okay, now to make it a little bit more interesting, ” Barton purred as he looked around the room.

 Small space of Melinda's living room did not provide many options for having fun. They ran out of DVDs to watch long time ago. After that they improvised. For the past two hours they'd been practicing hand to hand combined with knife throwing.

And they were getting bored. Again. 

Waiting for updates on their last not-so-successful mission without entertainment  was exhausting. And annoying. So sometimes, like now for instance, they came up with stupid ideas. 

“ I dare you to hit the thing on my head with your back to me," he said grinning. "You up for it? ”

 For quite a while he wasn ’ t satisfied with anything he found. Melinda waited, playing with the knife in her hand, pinning it in the air before catching it again. 

She crooked a brow at him as if saying is-that-all-you-can-come-up-with, before turning around and waiting for his signal that he was ready. Soon she heard a triumphant  ‘ Ha!, and seconds later there was a shining blade flying across the room. 

When she realised how wrong the decision had been, it was too late. Sound of ceramic breaking filled the room for instance and she saw the handle sticking out of something little, pointy and _green._ Oh crap.

She hadn't put much thought into it when Phil asked her to take care of his plant. It was a _cactus_ after all. A cactus with a _name._ Benjamin. She laughed for solid five minutes when Phil introduced her to her fosterling for the upcoming three weeks.

Phil glared at her but couldn't do much more since Benjamin was 'the only living being Phil was capable taking care of'. Those were his words. How she was planning on teasing him with it! Because how hard could it be? It might be a living thing but seriously what could possibly go wrong?

Well, it proved much harder than she'd thought. Because while she managed keeping it in penumbra (she put it on a shelf as soon as she came home the first day, and hadn't moved it since), and watering it once a week, she didn't count on her friends having idiotic ideas such as putting Phil's cactus as a target for knives!

So now she'd have to somehow explain her failure to Phil when he came back. 

God, she was going to kill Barton!

Or maybe not. An idea struck her. If she'd manage to get a new plant, an exactly the same, before Phil came back, maybe he wouldn't notice. And if he would, she'd blame Barton. It was his fault after all.

"Get into the car, we're going shopping," Melinda announced and didn't wait for answer before heading out of the flat.

~o0o~

"God May! Continents are moving faster!" Clint called after her. He was almost at the entrance of the store while she had yet failed to move away from the car. It took them only minutes to get from her apartment to the closest home improvement retail, but standing there next to the car she didn't want to get in. Which was stupid. Sure Phil wouldn't be mad at her for killing his plant? Recalling his expression as he handed her the flowers pot, she wasn't so sure. Wearily she hustled after Clint. For some reason she already knew they wouldn't find what they came looking for.

~o0o~

“ Phil, it was a cactus. ”

“ Exactly! How the hell did you manage to kill it?! ”

“ She rode a knife through its head. ” Clint dropped from between his laughter as he watched their exchange.

“ Barton! ”

“ You did what? ” Phil looked like he might faint.

“ It was an accident. And it wasn't even my fault. Clint made me!" Melinda crossed her arms in front of her chest defensively.

“ Hey, leave me out of this! ” Clint jumped from the bed. 

“ Yes, thank you for your input. ” Phil got hold of his arm and very effectively pushed him out of the door but before shutting it in front of his nose. Once they were alone, the room silenced, and he turned his back to her.

Melinda took a closer look at Phil. He came back about two hours ago, surprisingly uninjured and looking quite fresh despite his ten hours flight from Brazil. She didn't want to upset him as soon as he came back. Her plans for the evening were way, _way_ different.

"I didn't mean to hurt your plant, it was an accident," Melinda came up behind Phil, rubbing his arm gently. "I'm sorry, Phil."

"I only asked you to keep it not to grow the next population of some genetically modified superplants! Was that really that hard?" He sounded annoyed, and she wasn't surprised but she didn't deserve him talking to her like this.

“ Hey! I said I was sorry! I even bought you a new flower. ” Melinda called bewildered, before she slipped past him further into the room.

There was a moment of silence but she didn't turn to face Phil.  “ Benjamin  was an old man. ” Phil said after a minute, his voice serious but much calmer than before.  “ Just tell me he died painlessly and with honour. ”

Melinda threw a glance over her shoulder at him accomplied with an eye roll.  “ It was a cactus. ”

“ Painlessly and with honour, ” Phil stressed.

“ Fine! Your _plant_ died painlessly and with honour. ” Melinda sighed defeated. There was no way they'd be fighting over this.

“ Good. ” Phil nodded. He took the new blossom for closer examination.  “ I think this one will do okay as well. It'll need some serious training but it might just work. But how am I going to take care of it? It's an orchid. ”

Melinda hugged him tightly from behind. "I'll help you."


End file.
